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Alexei spent the next ten minutes speaking to Xav about business and the future of the bratva until Evelyn walked in with the entrées. So far, the food had been the most captivating part of the night. Without waiting, I helped myself to the steak tartare. Alexei raised an eyebrow at my audacity to start before a guest. I quickly realised that this would never work between us because I had no energy for false pretences and showmanship.

He seemed undeterred as he finally focused his efforts on wooing me instead of my brother, understanding that I had the power to decide whether this would proceed, not them, as they continued to deflect his questions back to me for an answer.

‘Tell me about yourself, Valentina. I hear that you love to read. What are you currently reading?’ he askedinnocently enough, seeming to at least be faking his interest to fool most people, but not me. He didn’t care about me—only the De Luca name and what it could afford him, just like the rest.

‘Oh, you wouldn’t know it.’ I brushed off his question, not wanting to engage. I wished he would just redirect his attention back to my brothers.

‘I’m quite well read; I might surprise you,’ he said, leaning in.

I set my fork down and leaned back in my chair, crossing my arms.

‘It’s calledWhore for Your Bloodlust. It’s about a young woman who captures the attention of a serial killer, but instead of fearing him, she feels wanted. So, she wants to do everything she can to prove herself to him. Right now, I’m reading quite a poignant scene where she gives him a blow job after watching him murder a man in cold blood. The author has quite a way with words. I can almost feel the stickiness of the victim’s blood in my own hair as he grips the back of her head, forcing her to choke on his enormous?—’

‘What the fuck, V?!’ Xav boomed as Z broke out in fits of laughter knowing I had stolen the book from his collection.

I didn’t react; instead, I watched as Alexei’s face slightly paled. Not because he was squeamish; you couldn’t afford to be in his family’s line of work. It was disgust I saw written on his face, but I never quite understood the word ‘shame’.

Wanting to push him further, I leaned forward, entering his space. ‘I have a lot of fantasies like those, think you could keep up with me?’ I left Alexei speechless and Xav with a throbbing headache as he pinched the bridge of hisnose, shaking his head and trying his best not to lose it in front of company.

‘Liar, we all know you’re the vanilla one in the family, you little sundae,’ Z remarked with a smirk on his face. He wasn’t wrong. I liked to read these stories, but what I actually craved in all of them wasn’t the physicality; it was the earth-shattering love, longing and possessiveness. I wanted to be consumed and I wanted to consume. Without meaning to, my mind went back to Sunshine and her eyes. That was the closest I had ever felt to touching that feeling. Realising this, I stood ready to leave.

‘Sorry, Alexei, I don’t quite see this working out. You need someone young, impressionable that you can turn into your perfect little trad wife, but that won’t ever be me. I know my power and I get the sense that you like to be the one in control.’

Then, turning to Z, I motioned for him to stand. ‘I need to go to the Velvet Room. Take me?’

Curiosity got the best of him as he turned to lead the way, leaving Xav muttering curses under his breath.

When we arrived at my brother’s club, he opened the door for me. One thing I loved about Z was that he never asked questions; he preferred to observe a situation—unless he had a knife to a man’s throat and his job was quiteliterallyto ask questions in the most brutal way possible. To Z, this was all one big amusing play, and he wanted to see why I had demanded to come here of all places, seeing as I had never had an interest before.

‘You have someone working for you—Sunshine. Where is she?’ I asked as I pulled up a stool at the bar.

Z went behind it to pour me a drink, making my favourite: gin and tonic with lime.

‘I was expecting one of the bartenders to have piquedyour interest, not one of my girls. Interesting… It’s nearly 8:00pm, so she’s likely in the staff lounge getting ready for her shift. She starts soon.’

I turned in my chair, ready to make my way to the lounge. I needed to see her again.

‘No. That is a safe space for the women; no one enters that space save for them, not even me. Do not take that from them. Sit and wait.’

Giving a frustrated sigh, I sat back down; he was right.

‘V, I’ll say this once and only once. You think we come from trauma? You’ve got nothing on her. Hurt her and I hurt you. I know you’re blood, but I swore an oath to protect each one of these women and I will not let you make me a liar. Do not go anywhere near her if you aren’t serious about her.’ He knocked back an entire glass of whiskey like it was water. The man loved pain.

‘I don’t know what I am, Zane. That’s why I need to see her again—to figure out what this is.’ I felt guilty and selfish because if what he said was true, then he was also right, and I should stay far away. But I doubted I could do that anymore, as she had continued to plague my mind these last few days. There was an undeniable pull that I didn’t want to resist anymore.

‘Well, figure it out quickly and no games. She’s not an experiment for you or an act of rebellion. You know Xav would never force a marriage you didn’t want, but I can run interference when it comes to next month’s dinner. You have one month to figure it out; by then, a decision needs to be made for everyone’s sake. I must say though, this makes a lot of sense to me.’

‘What does?’ I questioned, thrown off by his last comment.

‘You’ve always loved to care for those who are damaged.I also can’t picture you ever submitting to any man. I kind of thought you would have explored this side of yourself when you were younger, but better late than never.’ I was completely shocked by his declaration.

‘Your lady’s here, so what are you gonna do?’ he asked, nodding his head towards the main stage.

Pushing off the stool, I didn’t look back.

4

SUNSHINE