Chapter 85 - Letter from Heaven
Dive into Chapter 85 of "Red Heart Patrols the Sky": Seeing these words is like seeing me:Anan, by the time you read this letter, your... Find out more!
Seeing these words is like seeing me:Anan, by the time you read this letter, your mother will have gone to a place far, far away.
Itās so distant that I canāt come back in this lifetime.
Iā¦
am not a good mother.
When I was very young, your grandmother passed away.
No one taught me what a mother should be like.
I say these things not as an excuse but with regret.
Regret that I, who went through such a lonely childhood, heartlessly allowed you to experience the same.
Regret that I gained nothing from my own mother, and when I became a mother, I had nothing to give to my daughter.
Regret that as a mother, I also failed to teach you anything.
I didnāt teach you how a girl should protect herself, I didnāt teach you the difference between right and wrong, I didnāt teach you how to love someoneā¦ of course, I neither had the qualifications nor the capacity.
I think, your brother will teach you.
Hopefully, your brothers can all teach you.
He is a very promising child, and living with him will be a lot better for you than with me, your useless mother.
This is the only comfort I can give myself.
Anan, you are a good child.
Do you remember?
That time, around New Yearās, all the helpers had gone home for the holidays.
The medicine shop needed restocking, and I was moving those medicinal herbs back and forth by myself, dozens of trips, until I started crying.
When I had finished crying and looked back, I saw you staggering, delivering the herbs back to the storeroom handful by handful.
Many of the herbs were mixed up, but it warmed my heart.
At that moment, I felt immensely comforted yet incredibly lonely at the same time.
Loneliness is a devil; it devours human reason, morals, and even humanity itself.
It devours everything.
I was devoured by this devil, to the extent that I forgot how wonderful everything I had was.
To the extent that I lost it all.
Iām sorry.
I shouldnāt have said these things to you.
The weather has gotten very cool, have you put on extra layers?
I sewed a winter coat for you and sent it along with this letter.
There was also a hat, but I only finished half of itā¦ never mind.
Iām sorry.
I canāt send you gifts anymore.
Iām sorry.
Iāve left you behind againā¦
I am a shameful mother.
But I had no choice.
The things I was searching for have disappeared from this world, and I can only follow them, to a place far, far away.
Never to return.
I had thought to leave quietly, but then I felt that I shouldnāt leave without saying something to you.
Whether it is the final admonitions of a mother, or just the last self-consolation of an irresponsible woman.
I had to say something.
Anan.
This is the first letter I have written especially for you, and also the last.
I truly donāt know what to say that would be most appropriate.
Anan.
You must take care of yourself.
You must study hard, and when you grow up, follow in your brotherās footsteps: attend the Taoist Sect, you could also become a high-ranking official, become an Immortal.
No, I shouldnāt ask that of you.
I have no right to do so.
Cultivation is exhausting, you should do whatever you wish.
Still, you should eat less sweets; bad teeth arenāt pretty.
My Anan, when you grow up, you will surely be a great beauty.
How heart-stirringly beautiful will that be?
Just thinking about it makes me feel I could close my eyes.
Anan, you must be good.
You must listen to your brother.
You must grow up happy and safe.
Empty words serve no purpose.
But apart from these useless words, Mother has nothing else to give you.
Iām sorry.
I donāt know how your studies are going, whether you can fully recognize these words.
You can wait to read this later, if youād like.
Or if you donāt want to read it, thatās also okay.
Writing up to here, Mother suddenly remembered the days when your father taught me how to write.
Iām sorry.
I miss you.
Yongtai Year 14, the first day of the winter month, Song Ruyi.
When Jiang Wang received a letter from Wangjiang City, he was in a state of extreme anxiety.
Moreover, the letter was written by Anan herself, and considering it was sent by Auntie Song, he didnāt presume to read it on her behalf but instead directly passed the letter to Jiang Anan.
Anan joyfully bounced into the study to read the letter.
Meanwhile, Jiang Wang pondered over his own problems.
The appearance of the white bone lotus on his body was exceedingly abnormal; the sinister pattern was clearly not the product of any legitimate Taoist Sect.
There must have been some mistake, but he had no one to consult with.
He didnāt have a single elder he could fully trust, who would always support him at any moment and who had extensive knowledge.
Dong Ah might be trustworthy, but with his straightforward nature, if he knew that Jiang Wang had gotten involved with some crooked paths, he might very well kill him on the spot.
Righteousness exterminating a disciple.
As for Ling He and Zhao Rucheng, while they completely deserved trust, they were both just starting their cultivation and shouldnāt be relied upon too heavily.
Zhao Rucheng might have some mysterious background, but given the involvement of the Bone Tao, which even by its name sounded evil, Jiang Wang didnāt want to drag them into it.
He had looked through some Taoist canons, secret news, and event records, but information about the Bone Tao was nowhere to be found.
Either it had never appeared in Zhuang Country or its information had been erased.
The only certainty for Jiang Wang was that he had no recollection of any person or event related to the Bone Tao.
The latent connection to the Taiyin Star was due to the Taixu Illusion Realm and nothing else.
That woman with the black veil, what āsecretā did she want to know?
Was it the Taixu Illusion Realm?
What relation did that woman have with the Bone Tao?
If she was from the Bone Tao, what was her purpose?
If not, and if she truly came from an orthodox Taoist Sect as she claimed, why would she bring up the Bone Tao?
He suddenly thought about the black candle in the Tongtian Palace, which he had obtained from the Heart-Devouring Demonic Being.
The Zhou Tian Xing Dou formation chart came from the Taixu Illusion Realm and shouldnāt have any issues.
If there was anything peculiar in his body, it had to be this black candle.
What was its origin?
What were its secrets?
While Jiang Wang was deep in thought, Jiang Anan came running out crying.
āWhatās wrong?
Whatās the matter, Anan?ā Jiang Wang squatted down to embrace her.
āWhere is a very far place?ā Anan held up the letter, big teardrops rolling down one by one, āDid my mother go to heaven like father?ā
Only then did Jiang Wang realize the severity of the situation.
He scooped up Anan in his arms, consoling her, āItās okay, itās okay, Anan, donāt cry, your brother is here, your brother is here.
Brother will stay with you.ā
While comforting Jiang Anan, he took the letter and read through it quickly.
The letter was thin, but it seemed to have become very heavy all of a sudden.
Going by the usual delivery route, given the time it would take for correspondence between Wangjiang City and Fenglin City, things must have become irretrievable by now.
Jiang Wang didnāt have particularly strong feelings about Auntie Song, but she was his fatherās wife and Ananās mother after all.
She held an irreplaceable significance to Jiang Anan, being a very important part of her life.
And now she was gone forever.
Though Jiang Anan was still young, children arenāt completely oblivious to everything.
Jiang Wang himself had been through that age and he understood a childās sensitivity and fragility.
He understood how much the little one was hurting inside.
On normal days, when little Anan took a fall, Jiang Wang already felt unbearable pain for her.
Not to mention now, looking at her already swollen eyes, his heart was breaking.
āAnan, be good, donāt cry.
Brother is here, brother is here.ā
āWuu wuu, my mother, sheā¦ā
āAnan, Anan, brother will find a way to give you an explanation,ā Jiang Wang said, holding her small head gently yet firmly.
No matter who was involved, no matter the reason.